Alexis on the Sexes: What women want

ALEXIS MCKINNIS , | Updated 6/12/2013

How to find more female-oriented porn.

Q: I’m a straight woman who enjoys watching porn. I’ve only watched porn that is geared toward heterosexual men. I do get off on it and everything, but I feel like I would like it better if I could find material geared toward women. I’m not a big fan of erotica, which women are supposed to like. I like the down and dirty of “regular” porn videos. It’s just that if there was a bit more care in having hot guys, and showing their faces, and maybe less degrading cumshots and blowjobs and more breast, fingering and cunnilingus action, I would like it very much. Any advice about where to find this kind of thing, like for free, on the Internet?


A: You’d think with more than 30 percent of all Internet porn being consumed by women, at least 30 percent of free Internet porn would show that the proper way to stimulate a woman’s clitoris is directly with the tongue, vs. with a dick via her esophagus.

But as with anything else and especially garage sales, you have to cherry-pick through the free pile to find stuff you like — and that means encountering a few items that make you want to take a really long shower afterward. According to, a new pornographic video is created in the U.S. every 39 minutes. That makes for a lot of chaff and not nearly enough wheat, and otherwise reliable sites like and don’t always do the best job separating the two. “Sensual Lesbians Kissing” is not exactly a straight girl’s cream dream, you know? Those “Hot Stud Gives Explosive Oral” clips are there on the free sites, you just have to dig around a little.

I found a really awesome comprehensive post on called “Top 100 Porn Movies for Women.” There’s so much information there, including a few paragraphs on the differences between porn made for men and porn made for women, that I won’t even try to communicate it here. Caveat: It’s a retail site, but has an extensive selection of porn for ladies, so you’re in good hands.

If you’re willing to shell out a five-spot now and again, check out the wonderful Creator and CEO Cindy Gallop made waves with her TED Talk on how mainstream Internet porn is negatively affecting human sexuality. is unlike any other porn site I’ve seen, in that users create, submit, rent and rate all of the video content. Joining is free, as is browsing sneak peeks of user videos. A full video is $5 to rent, but you can access it as many times as you want over three weeks. Half of the proceeds go to the user who submitted the video. The videos are real and incredibly sexy; users are encouraged to be creative and eschew the usual cumshot clichés in favor of whatever feels good in the moment. There’s a lot of couples action that will definitely hit the spot when you want to see women being satisfied by attractive men.

I happen to side with Gallop on the issue of Internet porn and a shift in sexual behavior, so I will kindly ask you to consume your raunchy vids in moderation. Even if you’re watching real couples give each other real orgasms, there’s still a risk of desensitization to real, porn-free stimulation. That said, there’s not a thing wrong with cueing up a clip now and then when you’re feeling randy. I’m also sending you a copy of Violet Blue’s handy little book “The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn.” It’s not an index of the author’s favorite flicks, but rather a fact-packed guide on how to navigate the world of Internet porn for novices and veterans alike. Enjoy!

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