October 22, 2009
So long, farewell....
Posted in office:
Well, all good things must come to an end. And so it is with "That's What She Said."
Yes, after a good run, we're shutting out the lights on this @work column, but not without some grand learning along the way.
In fact, Vita.mn has asked employE to share some highlights from this past year. And, among the scribblings, what I found was this: beyond the rants and raves and boos and hoos lives the simple fact that a lot of us out there really like our jobs. And that, through our experiences and tales, the landscape of the corporate world really is shifting. And now, as we youngins' take our place as leaders, we're really creating office environments where it's safe to express ourselves, to break out of the box and -- gasp -- to actually have fun at this thing called work.
With that, here's a farewell @work manifesto to keep this dream alive. Read it, add to it, share it, do what you will... and, as always, keep on keepin' on. Peace out.
1) Always be yourself at work. You are freakin' magnificent. Share that with others.
2) Take responsibility for your day-to-day choices. No one can "make" you do anything.
3) Remember: "a wise man knows what he doesn't know." Repeat this daily.
4) Always give your colleagues credit even if you think you did all the work. (See #3.)
5) This is a world of abundance. Never let 'em trick you into scarcity thinking.
6) Dare with deliberation. Noble mischief is a brilliant thing in the office.
7) Exist beyond "either/or" thinking. The third way always creates a solution.
8) Everything that bugs you about your co-workers is a mirror of what bugs you about yourself.
9) What you feel is what you get. You can be afraid of losing your job, of looking stupid, of making the wrong choice. Or you can love a challenge, love to learn and love the adventure.
10) And finally, lighten up for Pete's sake. Have some fun. Chill out. You are safe. No one's coming to beat you up. And this ain't freakin' rocket science (even when it is).
October 20, 2009
Stuck at work?
Posted in office:
Remember, there's always somewhere else to go ... and someone else choosing to go.... right. this. minute.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1US_4uf4YE
October 12, 2009
Don't Wanna Be At Work Today? Hide.
Posted in office:
http://v1kram.posterous.com/liu-bolinthe-invisible-man
October 8, 2009
Yummy Office Lunches
Posted in office:
When the weather dips down, it's nice to bring a cozy, home-cooked meal to the office to avoid braving the elements.
This Fall, why not try something that's good for you ... and good for the planet ... and good for animals ... and just all-around good?
http://www.rhymeswithvegan.com/
(Word on the street is that RWV will soon be offering lunch delivery to offices around the TC! Keep an eye out!)
(And yes, RWV is a friend of employE's ... and yes, I've eaten her grubbin' food ... and yes, even meat-eaters can't believe how seriously grubbin' it is ... seriously)
October 5, 2009
OUCH!
Posted in office:
So... employE was at a cabin for a girls weekend.
Not even two beers in, employE was walking down the wet deck stairs and -- WHOOSH -- employE's legs go out from under her and -- BAM -- employE smashes her back + elbow on stairs and -- CRACK -- knocks her face on the unopened beer bottles in her hand while she slides down the remaining steps only to crash into the concrete below (side note: why is it when I fall down I manage to hold what's in my hand while the rest of my body takes the beating??) ...
ANYWAY: fast-forward to today where I look like Tina Turner during the Ike years (SERIOUS black eye ... arm in a sling ... hobbling around a bit) and, as I'm about to venture out to meetings and client presentations this week I wonder... Under the embarrassing, ultimate-clutz-of-the year circumstances, how much detail do I really need to give?
October 1, 2009
Stiletto Stoners
Posted in office:
Just forwarded to me by a friend: Stiletto Stoners. Successful career women unwinding with weed. (Sweeeeeet.)
Discuss.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/01/stiletto-stoners-successf_n_306773.html
October 1, 2009
Office Decorations: You Ready?
Posted in office:
October is upon us. And you know what that means.
Soon, our unassuming offices will be donned with spiderwebs and skeletons, pumpkins and party favors. Then comes turkeys and gourds, scarecrows and pilgrims. Of course, only to be followed by the politically-correct versions of red and green, blue and white, or black, red and green (choose your celebration...)
Oh dear. Are we ready for the seasonally-decorated office onslaught?
September 29, 2009
Jobs I'd Take In a Parallel Universe...
1. Hotel Concierge
2. Pit Boss
3. Limo Driver
4. Roadie
5. Check-Blank Designer (no more geese or windmills)
6. Tour Guide
7. Camp Director
8. Flight Attendant
9. Construction Worker
10. Red Bull Girl
September 28, 2009
Less Hide, More Seek
Posted in office:
"If they hide their power, feign their innocence, and generally fret that their confidence will rub some folks the wrong way, it's no wonder misguided young souls will try to walk all over them. Be proud of your magnificence." -The Universe
Or so says an inspirational quote in my inbox this morning ... And it got me thinking...
How many of us turn down our magnificence, our power, our beauty, our utter godliness the moment we walk through our office doors?
And, how many of us refuse to put any filter on that glorious entity, that rockin' pocket known as our soul? No matter where we are?
How brightly are you shining today?
September 25, 2009
TGIfreakinF
Posted in office:
Tonight's going to be a good, good night....
In fact, I feel like it's going to be like one of those 1980's movie scenes where everyone is SO excited it's Friday night and people are finishing up their day and clicking off their desklamps and the music starts to swell and the montage scene begins and cocktails are being shaken and ladies are applying lipstick and dudes are slicking their hair and people are rushing into happy hour and co-workers are high-fiving co-workers and --CRACK-- someone breaks the pool balls and --SMASH-- someone raises a toast and -- OOO! -- the eyes start to flirt and -- DAAAANG! -- someone licks their lips and -- SWISH! -- people start to dance until -- SCRREEEEEEEECH -- in walks "the nerdy boss" to this steamy, hot bar and the record scratches and everyone is silent until -- BAM! -- someone puts an umbrella drink in his hand and -- CHEER! -- the music starts up again and everyone is dancing and rocking and rolling and laughing and celebrating this day known to us humans as "Friday."
You in?
September 24, 2009
IT?? Where are you??
Posted in office:
It's an amazing feeling when -- suddenly -- one cannot access their email or their files or that snazzy thing called the interweb because "oops, our server is down" or "oops, 503 error" or "oops .... sorry, you addicted little lady, looks like you might have to pick up that old contraption known as the -- gasp -- telephone instead of emailing that client of yours!"
Fine. I will pick up the telephone. And I will call the IT help desk. And, through sobs and starts, like a frantic 911 call, I will tell them: "I need you to come IMMEDIATELY! A terrible accident is about to happen if you don't get here soon! Seriously, I am going to smash this computer against a wall or chuck it out the window if I can't email in the next five minutes! I have a deadline! And I NEED to email!! I'm not kidding! People's lives are in danger!! SERIOUSLY, YOU DON'T UNDERST-- oh, forget it. Seems to be working now."
(Anyone out there work in IT? Any "crazy people" stories to share?)
September 21, 2009
Pagan Potluck in the Break-Room!
Posted in office:
According to astrology, the planet Mercury is the ruler of communication -- conversation, media, the web, writing, etc.
And, when Mercury is "Retrograde," these types of communication can be compromised or confused or generally just f'ed up.
And when that happens -- case in point, I just lost an important file on my computer -- employE never hesitates to note aloud: "Oops, Mercury must be Retrograde again."
And when employE notes that point aloud, several people never hesitate to do one of the following activities: 1) roll their eyes, 2) laugh out loud and/or 3) say something like, "What??? You believe that crap??!!"
Personal beliefs notwithstanding, I always find it so humorous that this simple statement about a rock floating in the sky so often evokes some of the biggest reactions from some of the calmest co-workers.
Hee hee.
September 16, 2009
Design Star
Posted in office:
employE is taking part in the joy of remodeling her office.
That co-creative activity of co-choosing colors, fabrics, furniture, lighting with people as different as Kanye and Taylor. That experience of eye rolls and "you like THAT?!" and "you're kidding, right?!" That subjective slogging between different tastes and styles and design vibes until you finally land on the sweetest pad, the coolest crib, the awesome-est office out there...
This is the plan anyway ....
(And so I wonder: What's the design style of your office? Who made the decision? Have any inspiration for employE?)
September 15, 2009
Courage Works
Posted in office:
"A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer." -Ralph Waldo Emerson
What's the "courage" level at your office?
Are people standing fully in courage for what's right, what's innovative, what's daring?
("Kickass idea, Jenny! Let's try it ... if it doesn't work fully, we'll at least have a beta version to build upon.")
Or are people crouching in opposite corners, ruled by ego, pointing fingers of blame?
("Uh ... I didn't know I was supposed to be in charge of that?! Ed said HE was going to do that based on feedback he got from Liz -- who was SO crabby that day that I didn't even want to walk by her office let alone question anything. So... I don't know what you're trying to insinuate but it's somebody else's problem. Not mine.")
So: how brave are you all? Where does your office fall on the courage scale?
Share your story.
Or, try a quiz: http://www.courageinstitute.org/assess_yourself.asp
September 14, 2009
Do Stuff That Matters
Posted in office:
Another Monday ... are you bounding out of bed? Ready to dive into another wonderful day of your life's work?
Or, does your alarm clock have a worn-in divet where the word "snooze" used to be printed?
What purpose are you bringing to the world today?
September 10, 2009
Seasons change...
Posted in office:
When do you know fall has arrived?
School starting? State Fair ending? Leaves changing?
Or: is it when the office attire slips ever-so-slightly into longer slacks and heavier sweaters? And the snacks turn from watermelon chunks to pumpkin cookies? And the afternoon break goes from an iced mocha to hot chocolate? And the break from that ever-lovin', ever-blowin' air conditioner shifts into a battle over the thermostat (may the most persistent win)? And the fantasy football league takes over the god-dam#@$ break room? And the talk of "Favre-this" and "Favre-that" begins every single freakin' meeting??? And your co-workers start bringing in the wretched viruses from their immune-deficient urchins known as their children as they play and frolic in their germ-infested elementary schools?!!!???
Ahem.
What's the "start of fall" sign at your office?
September 9, 2009
Contacts, contacts, contacts.
Posted in office:
"Holy Sh*$! I can't believe I found you!! How have you been? What's new? What's up? Remember Mr. Halverson? That teacher who always grabbed his junk??!!!! What are you doing now??? Where are you living??? Tell me something new!!!"
Yes, it's another high school cronie who has found you on Facebook.
A gal/guy you were not all that close with. A person who, you believe, back-stabbed you a time or two in those halls of secondary education. A fellow-graduate who, apparently now has outgrown his/her love of Keystone Light as -- holy sh&!, look at that -- they are working for the very company where you would LOVE to work. And, how the hell did they get THAT job? And so what if the beeyotch gossiped a slam or two about you in the past, this angel could help you make some serious connections....
So, do you friend 'em?
Even after the not-so-great-memories, do you drop the resentment and reach out simply because they may have a job contact or two for you?
September 3, 2009
P-Ewwww
Posted in office:
Afternoon vent: employE is NOT a fan of Glade Air Fresheners.
That add-to-the-odor-of-feces-with-fake-cinnamon spray that someone -- with the best intentions, of course -- brings to the office bathroom.
I'd rather deal with the doo than inhale that cinnamon-scented crap. Any day.
September 1, 2009
Damn you fall semester!
Posted in office:
employE is missing her summer interns ... those bright-eyed, bushy-tailed folks who've now headed back to their respective universities to continue to learn business theory and rack up debt.
Is there a gaping void in your office? A cube with remnants of youth? A space littered with empty Red Bull cans and Delia's receipts?
(Oh, interns ... I wish you well. And I wish you were still here. This line at Caribou is WAY too long.)
August 26, 2009
It was LEGENDARY!
Posted in office:
OK. You know that story -- THE legend -- that's told around the coffee-pot campfire, passed down through the generations .... That legendary story of the most scandalous office affair, the loudest firing (or getting fired), the "craziest" holiday party, the biggest yelling match in the conference room .... you know: the ULTIMATE off-the-rocker work story.
employE loves these stories as they truly become legends and myths -- changed and heightened, of course -- as the rumor gets passed along the employee chain.
Have any to share to brighten my day?
August 25, 2009
Who Moved My Cheese?
Posted in office:
Hey at-work Packer fans: might be time to grab that old business book classic...
Or: what's the at-work buzz about Favre coming to the Vikings?
Who can believe it? Who's bitching to high heaven? And, most of all, who now has proof that, yes, hell can apparently freeze over.
Discuss.
August 21, 2009
Week by week by week...
Posted in office:
Where does the time go? Does anyone else feel like its Monday and then .... BANG! It's Friday?
Is it the love of the job? The back-to-back meetings? The projects and tasks and to-do-lists, oh my?
Anyone else in a time warp out there?
August 19, 2009
Job Search?
Posted in office:
How is the job climate out there? Still scarce and scary? Still onerous and off-putting? Still futile and f'ed up?
What are job seekers experiencing? Any up-turn on the horizon? Any light at the end of the tunnel? Any reason for a celebratory happy hour? Say, to toast your fabulous, new job?
August 18, 2009
Disability Insurance?
Posted in office:
The tough life of the working Rock Star: It appears that Steven Tyler fell off the stage at a recent show and now, the Aerosmith tour may be canceled. Oh, and this was after bandmate Brad Whitford was "forced to miss the initial dates due to a head injury ... sustained when he was getting out of his Ferrari."
Every job has its hazards .....
http://www.mtvasia.com/News/200908/07018319.html
August 18, 2009
Getting Laid (Off)
Posted in office:
Recession Sex. Apparently it's real.
How's your love life in light of your working life? Do tell.
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/headline/features/6566361.html
